Monday, December 30, 2013


As it is with most people, Motherhood and Age have brought me perspective in life. Anyone closest to me will tell the woman I am today is MUCH different than how I was 10 years ago. Once again, for most people, this is the norm, however, there is a new trend approaching. Women wanting to call themselves Grown Ass Women while still engaging in childish ass hoodrat behavior. Now don’t get me wrong, life is an evolution, and therefore we all have our occasional slip ups where we’re pissed the fuck off and acting an ass, but for the most part, we keep it together. Now I don’t know if it was all the crack going around in the 80’s or what, but in a lot of today’s families you can’t tell the elders from the youth if you go off of attitude and maturity alone. As a GROWN ASS WOMAN there are just certain things you don’t do because it leaves a bad taste of 'I'm a childish bitch” in the mouth… here’s my list.

Now, here me out, cause Im a mothafucka on ALL of my social media accounts, and I tend to share a lot of my personal stories and life experiences simply because of the fact that I like to relate to people. However, the over-sharing shit Im talking about is usually something like this…..

“Ladies, beware of Tyrone Smith, he’s a dirty ass nigga walking around spreading Syphillis. Im at the clinic this morning to abort his baby I was carrying because his trifling ass can’t keep a job, and outta nowhere I got hit wit paperwork and antibiotics, FUCK THAT HOE ASS NIGGA!!” 

I just don’t understand for the life of me why people like to put other people on blast at the expense of making themselves seem like a fool. This my friend, reeks of attention-whoring and trying to play the victim card. You’re 31 years old out here letting the world judge you off of some shit that needs to be kept in your household. You got fucked over by a foul ass dude, shit happens, you too old to be seeking the attention of random ass people on the internet. Go ahead and get your week of “Niggas aint shit” rants out of your system like the rest of us that have taken an L before and go find a damn hobby.
We're not even gonna speak of the ratchets who feel the need to tell the world about how their vagina every 5 seconds 

"Ass fat, titties sitting nice, wet pussy like Niagra falls and it smell like roses" 

Girl if you don't sit yo, "Pay me some attention and put yo dick in my mouth" ass down somewhere. Grown women aren't tacky, and over-indulging about how you like yo ass ate or getting fucked from the back is some wack tacky shit. We're all out of high school now, everybody fucks. That's not the point. The point is that no man wants to raise a child with the woman who gives the world detailed descriptions of her walls on twitter. It's ok to have a lil freaky moment and every now and again, but damn, grow up and be SOMEWHAT of a lady...

This here is a tricky one. No matter how old we get, there we always come a time when we may have to throw the high road out and fuck somebody up. It may be someone just walking up on you putting hands on you or your child, it may be a threat your family’s safety, whatever. These aren’t the situations I’m talking about. I’m talking about childish ass “she talkin shit and I don’t tolerate disrespect,” getting a babysitter for the kids and riding out to bitch house fights. There’s nothing cute about a grown ass woman fighting because they can’t handle somebody talking shit about them. At this point I will refer you to the example above, seeing as though most of the fights that go down nowadays begin on a goddamn social media site. “That bitch on Facebook talking about I’m a hoe, and my kids ugly as hell, Im bout to go beat her mothafuckin ass!!!” Boy let me tell YOU!!....I’m probably the undisputed CHAMP of FB beef in Detroit. I’ve had so many hating ass bitches talk about me, my family, my pockets, my house, it’s unreal. According to some bitches Im a fucking HIV having porn star…..and guess what? I DON’T GIVE A FUCK. See the thing is, when you become secure in who you are, you don’t care about what somebody has to say about you. You simply can’t do things as an adult as you did at 16, there can be steep consequences. You may catch a case and go to jail. Now not only do you risk keeping custody of your children, you can also severely limit your ability to financially take care of them upon release due to being a convicted criminal. Plus, have you seen worldstar lately? These hoes don’t fight fair anymore, you might get hit with some shit or shot up….all because a bitch ran her mouth. I know so many situations that should have ended with a simple fight but went so far left its unreal.  But a CHILDISH HOODRAT bitch will risk her life and freedom to protect her name in the hood or her image on FB/TWITTER.  Here’s a quick lesson for you that I’ve learned over the years, fighting does not keep someone from talking shit about you. Unless you go all the mob style and catch a body, they will get they ass beat and get right back on that smartphone to make a stat STILL TALKIN SHIT. Don’t do it unless absolutely necessary. (I must admit tho I did almost Diamond from Player's Club a bitch a couple months ago but that's another story)….but I digress…..still that brings me to another point…..

I’ve caught a case before. (FUCK YOU EASTPOINTE POLICE). It was a minor ass possession of marijuana charge, but still, that shit was nnnoooo fun at all. I spent 12 hours in jail before being bailed out and when I tell you I dedicated my life to Christ the entire 12 fucking hours, MAN! Nothing renders you more helpless and un-grown than being in jail. You have no privacy, you look like a homeless person with bad hair and county clothes, you’re isolated from your family, and you have lost the ability to make decisions and have control of your life. Who wants that shit? I would say at least 75% of the population has caught a charge before even if it’s been over something as simple as a traffic ticket. Nobody wants to be locked up, I don’t care how gangsta you are or how many kilos of cocaine you sold. You definitely can’t be a PARENT making stupid ass decisions that land you in jail, who’s going to raise your children? Hopefully not the state. If you’re lucky enough to have family that gets them you’re never gonna hear the end of “I didn’t have these kids and it aint my responsibility to raise them because you made some dumb ass decisions.” Your son might grow to only know how to properly roll blunts and escape a high speed chase, while your daughter is getting slutted out from a lack of healthy male love and attention.  Shit even if you do avoid the actual incarceration, who wants to be on probation and get pimped by the STATE?  First of all, I love my money. And like the rest of us, I hate bills like a hood bitch hates welfare regulations. The absolute worst bill that anyone has ever had to pay is their fucking probation/parole officer (or child support lol) simply because of the fact that it was avoidable.  It’s ok to make mistakes and get caught up, but to repeat them only shows you’re irresponsible and incapable of making grown ass choices.

Forreal y’all….Im sick of seeing hoodrats in the club fresh to death because they decided to go on the hunt for new dick as opposed to paying their rent. Bitches screaming “I don’t who you talking to Im grown!” as they walk down the block Vaseline’d up ready to throw blows with some girl she found her man with. Threatening people, cursing and acting a fool because somebody took your favorite parking spot at work and you’re having a bad day. That shit isn’t grown, IT’S PATHETIC. Salute to my ladies who know how and when to choose their battles, because honestly, we’re all in an even bigger war of life. These hoes may seem like they’re winning from all the ignorant attention they get, but believe me, when the fight’s over, it’s the grown ass women who hold shit down that get the true perks in life.